that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize