i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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