Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
