can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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