She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
