Taylor Swift is so right about you.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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