I want to stick my p in your. b.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
