can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I just had sex on a roof
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Drunk is a universal language darling
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
