She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
