I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
