She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
