lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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