Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
