none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
