oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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