If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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