Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
