So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
birth control should be required to get into college
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
