first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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