he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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