It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
