your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
The ass gains better be worth it
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