Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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