Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
