Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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