yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize