did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
