wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
