belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
