Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
