Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
