I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
