i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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