my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
