Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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