I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
