please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
This baby is an asshole
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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