You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
