I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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