Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
