And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
