my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
