I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
