when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
