Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
