The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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