Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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