So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
