Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize