found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
