That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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