I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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