I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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